"Did you hear me? I said I'd like my eggs over easy"
"Uh, yeah. Sure thing, Mac."
She scribbled the order on the pad she pulled from her apron. Walking toward the kitchen, her eyes were again drawn to the window. But this time she knew why. Standing outside was a man. A man wearing clothes that looked like something from the 1800s. The waitress didn't remember hearing about any kind of festival in town that would explain clothes like that. The man kept looking at a notebook in his hand, then around the area. He nodded his head as though coming to a decision and crossed the street to the opposite side. The waitress saw him pull something from his bag. It looked like... duct tape? He bent over and taped the edges of an old cardboard box that had been sitting up against a lamp post. Just as the waitress was about to turn to the cook, she saw a flash of light around the man. Then he was gone.
"Something wrong with ya?"
"No, no. I just... thought I saw something a bit strange, ya know?" the waitress answered.
"Strange like what?"
"Oh, probably nothing. Just a bit bleary-eyed after all these hours. You know how it is."
"Sure thing. Hey did ya need something?"
"Oh, almost forgot. Guy at table four wants two eggs, over easy."
---
© Matthew Bacon
12 comments:
What's in the box? :) Who was that guy? Are you going to tell us next week? :) Welcome to fridayflash!
Nice job! It could go anywhere! I hope you write more!
Welcome to fridayflash! I think I'm addicted too. ;)
I used to wait tables... long hours. You'd be surprised how your eyes can play tricks on you, or help you write flashfiction ;-)
I hope too read more on Fridays
~2
Well done! (and by well done I mean "this was delightfully infuriating in it's incomplete intriguing-ness. (which isn't a word.) (but you know what I mean.)" You certainly hooked my interest, I'd like to read a sequel, or an installment, or whatever you like. Just tell me what was in the box!
Cool story. I once saw two "cows" walk past a window after working 2nd and 3rd shifts. Hope to read more next week.
I think I'd like to imagine what's in the box... maybe a large amount of cash left by her future son for her, so she doesn't have to wait tables any more... looking forward to reading more of your work, anyway.
Welcome to #fridayflash. An intriguing little scene. I like that the narrator doubts her own senses here. Will we find out what the guy was up to?
I got a very Doctor Who feeling from this. I wonder what dimension he was shooting for?
Welcome to #fridayflash. Hope to read more of your flash in the weeks to come.
~jon
Excellent job! This story shows why I like flash fiction so much: you can show just a few seconds out of someone's day, and it doesn't have to have answers. This one leaves us with nothing but questions (except for what the guy at table four wants for breakfast). I'm guessing everyone who reads it will have some guess as to what's going on.
I like this - because I've always liked stories that don't tell me, the read, everything that's going on.
Of course, this one tells me almost nothing of what's going on - which is even better. Something to let my imagination run on.
The writing itself, very tight, spare. Nothing wasted.
Nice work.
Hopelessly addicted. Can't wait to read more!
What an intriguing piece. So many questions about why she saw the man and apparently nobody else did. Welcome to #FridayFlash
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